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5月13日 If Everyone Cared祈祷平安
 If Everyone Cared
by Nickelback
From underneath the trees, we watch the sky
Confusing stars for satellites I never dreamed that you'd be mine But here we are, we're here tonight Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied If everyone shared and swallowed their pride Then we'd see the day when nobody died And I'm singing
Amen I, Amen I, I'm alive
Amen I, Amen I, Amen I, I'm alive And in the air the fireflies
Our only light in paradise We'll show the world they were wrong And teach them all to sing along Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive (I'm alive) And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are If they could love like you and me Imagine what the world could be If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied If everyone shared and swallowed their pride Then we'd see the day when nobody died When nobody died... We'd see the day, we'd see the day When nobody died We'd see the day, we'd see the day When nobody died We'd see the day when nobody died 5月11日 哈哈1 . 猎人打猎，看树上有两只鸟，举枪打下一只，发现是只没毛的，正纳闷，另一只鸟飞下来大骂猎人：他妈的，老子刚哄她把衣服脱光，你就把她打下来了。。。
2.农夫要杀公鸡却逮不着，于是抓起母鸡对公鸡说：再不下来让你当光棍儿！公鸡：你他妈以为我傻呀，我下去她就成寡妇了。。。
3. 某饭店养只鹦鹉挂在门口，有客到就说："你好欢迎光临！"一常客想：我快点进看你有何反应。一天他"蹭"就跑进去了，鹦鹉说："他奶奶的！吓我一跳！！！"
4.一次军事演习中，一颗炮弹偏离很远，派去查看的士兵发现：炮弹落在农田里，田中正站着你，你衣衫破碎满面漆黑饱含热泪地说：偷颗白菜犯得着用炮弹轰？？？
5.餐厅苍蝇对厕所苍蝇说：你整天追腥逐臭，我整天吃香喝辣，过来吧！厕所苍蝇：道不同不相为谋，吃在好有啥用，光屁屁美女你见过几个？？？
6.京九铁路通车，沿线农民路边观看，车上一女客换卫生巾后扔出窗外，迎面贴一农民脸上，农民拿下后说：我操！这车就是快，飘张纸都能把鼻子打出血来！！！
7.你听过吗？前世500次回眸才换得今生的擦肩一过，1000次回眸才有缘今生相视一笑，像咱们这样的朋友，上辈子没干别的，光他*的回头了。。。
8.一女在厕所小便，一醉鬼酒后误入，听到哗哗尿声，忙说：别倒了，我真的不喝了！女吓坏了，不敢在尿，憋不住放了个屁，酒鬼说：我操，怎么又启了一瓶！
9.清早起来，公鸡把母鸡好顿揍别人为其拉开，问母鸡：公鸡为何打你？母鸡说我也不知道便问公鸡，公鸡说：操它亲娘的，它今天早晨起来下了个鸭蛋！！！
10. 20年前妈抱着你在等车，人都笑话孩子长的难看，妈哭了，一个卖香蕉的老大爷拍拍妈妈说：大妹子别哭啦！把香蕉给你家猴吃吧！真可怜都饿的没毛了。。。
11.农民赶驴进城，遇到无赖，无赖：吃饭没？农民说：吃了。无赖：我问的是驴。农民一听，转身对驴扇两耳光：妈的，城里有亲戚也不说一声。
12.猪找上帝要求投胎做人。帝问曰：耕种？答太苦。曰：做工？答太累。曰：耍猴？答太难。帝问何求？答：能吃能喝还能嫖！帝大惊：狗日的还想当国家干部！
13.产房里一小孩出生后哈哈大笑，接生护士都非常奇怪，围拢观察发现小孩拳头紧握，掰开后发现是一粒堕胎药，只听小孩说：他妈的！想干掉我？没那么容易！！
14.鸭子和螃蟹赛跑，同时到达终点，难分胜负，裁判说：你俩来石头剪子布吧！鸭子大怒：他妈的！黑哨 啊！算计我，我一出就是布，他一出总是剪！ （转）学生与食堂的爆笑协议甲方：某高校全体学生 乙方：学校食堂全体职工 本协议甲乙双方应本着互相谅解、互相尊重的原则：即食堂工作人员谅解学生的行为，学生尊重和适应厨师的手艺。 乙方 第一条：油炸糕、馅饼等食物的直径必须超过5厘米； 第二条：包子陷儿里出现小强的次数，平均每周不得超过3次； 第三条：肉菜里面肉的含量必须超过5％，米饭里面沙子的含量不得超过30％； 第四条：一些家常菜必须标明名称，或至少能够使10个以上同学辨认出菜里底物质成分； 第五条：馒头和花卷儿必须保证是完整的，至少不能被其他人咬过或遗留下齿类动物的牙印； 第六条：盛饭时不准依据女同学的相貌决定打饭的数量； 第七条：每次饭菜出锅后，厨师应当着至少10个以上同学底面亲自品尝，在嘴里咀嚼的时间超过10秒钟，才可以供全体学生食用。 甲方 第一条：不准在食堂底墙壁上刻上厨师的名字，并在旁边悬挂小强的尸体，举行追悼会等等； 第二条：不准用馒头、花卷儿等伤害性极大的硬物投掷厨师颈部以上、腰部以下的部位，以免造成致命伤； 第三条：由于饭菜造成的呕吐，不得故意跑到打饭窗口对着厨师进行，以免影响其他同学的食欲； 第四条：不得要求ppmm拿10个以上的饭盆打饭； 第五条：女同学在吃包子的时候发现已经法定死亡的“小强”，尖叫音量不得超过90分贝； 第六条：不得利用食堂的饭菜作为玩扑克牌失利的惩罚赌注； 第七条：当天主打菜如果是鸡爪子，严禁集体把鸡爪子中指竖起来，对厨师进行侮辱性挑衅。 以上全部条款于××××年×月×日起执行，如果某方违约，将负责吃光食堂当天所有剩饭。 5月5日 FinallyFinally by Fergie
I finally stopped tripping on my youth Finally MMMMMMMM I remember the beginning you already knew Found what it's like to hurt selfishly I Finally got out of my own way Finally MMMMMMMM Finally, Finally yea... Finally Finally Ohhhhhhhh!! Finally, Finally...Finally.... 健康^_^绿茶 红葡萄酒 酸奶 豆浆 骨头汤 蘑菇汤
饭后漱口保护牙齿
玉米，哈哈
劳动者 杂食者 乐观者
常锻炼身体
要好心情
这样才不会变成行李卷 5月3日 Pretty Amazing GracePretty Amazing Grace
by Neil Diamond
Pretty amazing grace is what You showed me
pretty amazing grace is who You are I was an empty vessel You filled me up inside and with amazing grace restored my pride Pretty amazing grace is how You saved me and with amazing grace reclaimed my heart love in the midst of chaos calm in the heat of war showed with amazing grace what love was for You forgave my insensitivity and my attempt to then mislead You You stood beside a wretch like me Your pretty amazing grace was all I needed. Stumbled inside the doorway of Your chapel humbled in God by everything I found beauty and love surround me freed me from what I fear ask for amazing grace and You appear You overcame my loss of hope and faith gave me a truth I could belive in You led me to a higher place showed Your amazing grace when grace was what I needed look in a mirror I see Your reflection open a book You live on every page I fall and You're there to lift me share every road I climb and with amazing grace You ease my mind Came to You with empty pockets first when I returned I was rich man didn't believe love could quench my thirst but with amazing grace You showed me that it can In Your amazing grace I had a vision from that amazing place I came to be into the night I wandered wandering aimlessly found Your amazing grace to comfort me. pretty amazing pretty amazing pretty amazing pretty amazing pretty amazing pretty amazing pretty amazing pretty amazing You overcame my loss of hope and faith, gave me a truth I could believe in. You led me to that higher place showed me that love and truth and hope and grace were all I needed.  |
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